It’s no secret that Asian males are constantly emasculated when it comes to mainstream media — they’re usually portrayed as nerds or martial artists at best.
Even when they do get lead roles like Jet Li in “Romeo Must Die” or Chow Yun-Fat in “The Replacement Killers”, they don’t get intimate with the lead actresses like white actors often do. Acclaimed Asian-American actor Aki Aleong once noted that after being in the business for 60 years, he had never kissed a girl onscreen.
But times are changing, and more and more people are starting to appreciate the beauty of Asian males — one of those people is Holly Wolf.
Wolf, 27, is a model and cosplayer who’s been featured numerous times in Playboy — she was Playmate of the Year in 2014 for Playboy Czech and was most recently featured in Playboy Philippines. She currently makes a living as a cosplayer and model with over 3.5 million fans on Facebook.
One unique trait about Wolf is that she only dates Asian men. While some might assume it’s because she probably grew up around mostly Asians, the opposite is true.
“I grew up in an area called Halton Hills in Orangeville. It’s about an hour and a half north of Toronto.” Wolf told NextShark.
“It was a very suburban white area. There were no kids of color when I went to school. I think I saw my first black kid when I was 15.
“I dated the blonde-haired, blue-eyed, white super jocks in school growing up. My first boyfriend was your typical blonde-haired, blue-eyed rugby player. Now that I think about it, it’s kind of like, ugh, terrible. I was just like, ‘Ew, my high school self. Gross.'”
The lack of exposure of other races growing up made Wolf curious of other cultures. In college, she took an intro to Japanese culture and became intrigued by Asian culture specifically, but it wasn’t until the end of college where a guy she was seeing at the time, who was white, introduced her to K-Pop.
“He took me down to his basement and he put on Girls Generation for me.” Wolf recounted.
“I was like, ‘What is this magic? This is amazing.’ Then I just found Big Bang and 2NE1 and all these other huge K-Pop groups. I was just obsessed with watching all these videos. It just kind of blew my mind.”
College was the last time Wolf had a white boyfriend. From graduation and beyond, she was exclusively dating Asian men.
“I went to school for dance and musical theater. I love dancers. I’ve always had such an affection towards dancers and artistic types. Seeing music videos where the dancing was just amazing and out of control, I think that was so great. I continued to watch stuff like Big Bang. Then I dated a few Asian dancer friends of mine, and then it kind of just all went from there. I solely find [Asians] just much more attractive. It was just a weird, slow switch.”
Now, whenever Wolf is out with her friends and is courted by persistent non-Asian men, she has to break everything to them.
“Sometimes people are too persistent, and I will literally have to just say, ‘Look, you’re not my type. I like Asian guys, don’t even try. I don’t even find you remotely attractive.’ They get so angry at me. So angry. Then they’d bring up the whole tiny penis thing. Then I’d be like, ‘First of all, do you think I have a giant vagina? What’s wrong with you? That’s rude. Secondly, no, they’re not all like that. Go away, you asshole.'”
Wolf says that she specifically gets a lot of anger and negativity from white males when she tells them she’s into Asian guys:
“People hate. That’s the thing, especially white guys. They get so angry. I’ve had people just call me all sorts of names after rejecting them. They just get so angry to the point where they’d call me a whore and a slut and, ‘Oh, I didn’t like you anyway,’ all this crazy stuff.”
When asked about the famous stereotype that Asian men have small penises, this is what Wolf had to say:
“The whole small penis thing is absolutely insane, because anyone of any race can have any part of their body that might be bigger or smaller.”
“The whole Asians aren’t good looking thing is just such bullshit. I guess because I’m so into Asians, I just don’t find it reasonable why people think that, because I’m the complete opposite. I see white guys and I’m like, ‘Ew. Gross.’ All the time, people are like, ‘Oh, he’s so good looking.’ I’m like, ‘No, no, no, no. This person isn’t good looking. What are you talking about? I’m so confused.'”
When asked about the lack of AMWF relationships, Wolf says that Western culture’s portrayal of Asian males in the past has had an impact of not only how they’re viewed but also the confidence of Asian males when it comes to dating.
“I think it’s just society as a whole, especially in Westernized culture, it’s such a huge deal that Asian males are obviously a little bit shy and put off about it. They’re like, ‘Oh, goodness. It’s going to be so hard for me to get a girl, especially if I want to date someone outside of my own race.'”
“For girls, I hear a lot of, ‘Oh, wow, it’s so interesting that you date Asian boys.’ I’m like, ‘Why is it interesting? They’re still a person. I’m not an alien. So what if they’ve got a different facial structure and they come from a different part of the world?’”
Since she’s discovered her love for Asian culture, Wolf has traveled to many parts of Asia including South Korea, Thailand, Indonesia, and The Philippines. She wants to visit China, Japan, and Singapore in the near future. She says culture shock has never been an issue for her and she’s always excited to go.
In fact, she met her current boyfriend while traveling to the Philippines for work. She was at a club with some friends when they were introduced. He’s Filipino and plays for a basketball team in his home country and has a Canadian passport as well.
“When we first met, he didn’t think anything of me, because he’s like, ‘Oh, it’s probably another European girl who doesn’t like Asian boys.’ That’s very typical there. White girls in the Philippines, they’re not really about it.
“I wasn’t really into him really because we were introduced and he said, ‘Hi’. I’m like, ‘Oh, you play basketball. I don’t like sports. Do you watch anime? Do you play video games? Come on.’ He said he was Canadian, so that’s why we kept talking, because it was nice to talk to someone who’s from Canada, and it stemmed from there.”
When asked if she has any advice for Asian males out there looking to improve their dating lives, Wolf simply sums it up with: Be confident, be yourself, and don’t have too big of an agenda when going out. Having fun is key.
“When going out with your friends, focus on having a good time. When guys go out purely to get girls, girls can sense it and it’s a bit of a turn off. Guys need to get over that whole aspect and go out to have a good time. Meet people, but don’t be so focused on [getting girls], because it will affect you negatively as opposed to just being confident in yourself and eventually finding someone who is good for you. I feel like people that force relationships will never end well.”
Wolf is currently traveling for upcoming conventions for cosplay and will be featured in an upcoming issue of Playboy Philippines.