China’s Army Reports New Recruits Are Too Fat and Masturbate Too Much

More and more young Chinese people are deemed to be too unfit to join their nation’s military, China’s state media revealed.

People’s Liberation Army Daily newspaper reported that around 57% of cadet hopefuls in one Chinese city were rejected for being unhealthy. The figures further stressed that 20% of those who applied were simply too fat to join.

The report, which was spread via the agency’s social media account, noted that a majority of those who failed the physical exam were also found to be suffering from liver and kidney problems. It then blamed the high mineral content in water for the organ problems.

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Interestingly, the findings also showed that 8% of the men who applied had unusually large testicular veins reportedly due to “excessive masturbation.” Many of the applicants were found to have poor eyesight, which makes them unqualified to join the largest army in the world.

According to Daily Mail, the military agency cited junk food and alcohol as the main culprit in the applicants’ bad health. Senior staff members also point out excessive use of gadgets such as smartphones for the lower standards found among Chinese youth.

In order to have better chances of passing, the post recommended potential candidates to do the following:

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  1. Cut out fizzy drinks and alcohol
  2. Spend less time in front of screens.
  3. Exercise more.
  4. Cut down on computer games and/or masturbating.
  5. Develop better sleeping habits.
  6. Don’t get a tattoo.
  7. Drink clean water.
  8. Seek corrective treatment for genetic conditions such as excessive sweating or flat feet.
  9. Seek treatment for mental health issues.
  10. Have better standards of hygiene and sanitation.

However, China’s defense ministry clarified that a higher number of rejected applicants does not equate to a decrease in troop quality, noting that the PLA simply has a high standard.

“China’s recruitment process has strict rules and procedures,” the ministry said in a statement. “The quality of our recruits is guaranteed and the headwaters of our military will flow long and strong.”

But while the report sounds depressing, it did add a claim that it is far worse in the United States, where 80% of the applicants were unable to pass due to similar issues.

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